Divorce By Women

Chart of the Day: Why Women Are Divorcing Their Trash Men?

Marriage represents the fairy tale ending every couple dreams of. It’s the time when they move their relationship to the next stage in a lifelong partnership defined by love and commitment. Unfortunately, life is no fairy tale, and marriages end all too often.

Both marriage and divorce rates have been in decline. So though both these rates are in decline, a better way to view divorce is the ratio of marriage relative to divorce. See this in the chart below and learn more here. The trend has been evident over the decades – marriages end in divorce more and more.

us ratio divorce and marriage

Interestingly, when people are married, women are overwhelmingly more likely than men to ask for a divorce. In the US, it’s estimated that 70% of women in heterosexual relationships are the ones to initiate divorce (see here, here, here, and here). However, most women will say that their partner’s bad behavior is what caused them to initiate the divorce. What is it about marriage that pushes women to the breaking point?

The causes of divorce can be a dubious exercise to gather data, but we gathered three data points to see if we can see any patterns. See the summary of three studies in the chart below and learn more here, here, and here.


The stereotypes often cited as “acceptable reasons” for divorce are infidelity, money, or domestic abuse. The rest are reasons of “can’t get along.” Perhaps the above chart is hard to read (click the image to expand), but the following are key data summary points (averages) when looking at the causes of divorce stereotypes.

  • Infidelity – 25.5%
  • Money – 10.1%
  • Domestic abuse – 5.2%
  • The rest, which can be broadly summed up as: “can’t get along” – 59.2%

No doubt that the cause of “money” is always a factor in a divorce or in any relationship for that matter. However, 10.1% of the cause of divorce being “money,” which is surprisingly low. One could easily factor this cause into the “can’t get along” category.

Domestic abuse is another common stereotype reason women use to initiate divorce. However, statistically, 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men have been victims of severe physical violence by an intimate partner. So though it is true women are nearly 2 times more likely to be victims of domestic violence in marriage, it is not 100%. So the 5.2% “domestic abuse” cause of divorce, though an understandable reason for divorce, on average, is a statistical ruse.

What about infidelity as a significant cause of divorce? The chart below indicates this gender “infidelity” gap varies by age. Among married adults ages 18 to 29, women are slightly more likely than men to be guilty of infidelity. Infidelity for both men and women increased during the middle ages. But the infidelity gap among those ages 50 or older grows widely.

cheating by gender

Hence, the notion that infidelity at 25.5% of the causes of divorce is significantly the fault of men is yet another statistical ruse.

This leaves us with the “can’t get along” category as the major cause of divorce. We ask again, “What is it about marriage that pushes women to the breaking point?” The unfortunate reality is that marriage is becoming increasingly problematic as we simply “can’t get along.” The point of this article is to debunk some common stereotype reasons.

Often, men will blame feminism – women that want it all at the expense of marriage. Women will blame trash men that simply can’t accept the notion of the modern independent woman. Which is it? Do these marital dynamics cause conflict to cause us to “not get along?”

In any case, what this does to our culture, traditional families, and our children, who often become part of the single-parent family phenomenon, is becoming more apparent. Our society is collapsing. Remember, culture is upstream from politics. Perhaps this is part of what fuels our chaotic political environment today.

In the comment section below, give us your take on why women are divorcing their trash men in growing numbers.

See more Chart of the Day posts.

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 RWR original article syndication source.

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  1. To begin an article about divorce calling ex or soon to be ex husband ” trash ” shows the bias of the writer.
    Divorce in most states now are classified as No Fault, meaning the couple are not compatible.
    Why this is happening to marriages so often have many different reasons but in our instant gratification world the I want now mentality is prevalent in many marriages. So why are no calling a man who disagrees with his wife ” trash ” ? It’s entirely possible the wife is as much of the problem as she husband, in many cases more so but you obviously aren’t able to process that fact.
    Divorce favors women in America so it makes sense it would be the wife to file, The courts will normally rule she will get; the house, the children, spousal support, child support, etc, etc. So while her life hasn’t changed much the ex-husband is now living in a small apartment working overtime to pay the mortgage, car note, and the rent on his apartment, yep sounds like a big incentive for him to file.
    How about doing some actual research before writing another article, it might actually make you seem somewhat intelligent…..

  2. Happily married almost 27 years here. Divorce is not a complicated issue. All divorce occurs for one reason only- selfishness. This happens sometimes with one or both partners, usually both. When I think back on the toughest times of my marriage, it was when I was wrapped around the axle about my own needs, and not about taking care of those that were supposed to mean the most to me. I let my job, my things, and my wants control me. The hardest thing any of us can master is ourselves. True love is gift of self, and successful marriages come about when both the husband and wife understand this, set aside self interests, and devote their lives to the well-being of the other. This falls on deaf ears a lot in a world where YOLO has become a common phrase, and everyone has dropped a Christian lifestyle for a secular one.

  3. @Tom Williams
    I’m 64 years old and have real life experiences, I don’t need to go look for charts of what’s going on. Myself, friends, coworkers and people who happen to be in my social sphere are what I use to see what is going on in the real world. Anyone can make a graft or poll say anything the one paying for it wants it to say…..
    I agree with Mutts summary on making marriage work, it takes 2 people that want it to happen,. In today’s instant gratification word clearly half of married people would rather divorce than to the hard work, and yes I include myself in this group so I’m not nit picking .
    As I stated earlier on why women are the ones most likely to file for the divorce, just spend a day or two in a courtroom filled with divorce dockets and you’ll see I am correct…….
    As to your satire claim, satire is sometimes hard to get in written form, but no I don’t take your article as such. I take it as more trashing men in general and husband’s in particular, which seems to be the norm these days…
    Your opinion may differ and that’s fine, it’s how free speech is supposed to work, thank you for having open comments on your article…
    Have a good day….

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Written by Tom Williams

Born down on the farm in America's Midwest, my early life was spent climbing the ladder via a long career in information technology. Starting as a technician, and after earning a degree going to night school, I eventually found a place working at ATT Bell Laboratories as a software engineer.

Later moving into management and then a long stint in a major management consulting firm working with major banking, telecommunications, and retail companies. Working in various states in America, I also spent considerable time living and working in several European countries - currently expat in France. As a side career, I was heavily involved in real estate development and an avid futures trader. This experience can give one a unique view of the world.

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